I mean really we seem to be normal people on the outside. And sadly the inner working don't seem all the strange to us. Well until we say these things out loud!!!
Lets take out Family Christmas Party for instance. We all get together, have good food, play games, bond, laugh, somebody usually cries, there is some sort of disagreement and we all leave as friends. That seems to be pretty normal and right up there with the rest of the families in the world.
We have a "white Elephant" gift exchange. We do true White Elephant gifts of items found around your house. You may get a tie, a lid to a pan, 4 stale Lofthouse Cookies, a Vacation in a box, a bracelet, a box of Mac... You get the idea still seems normal right? Well here it comes I am going to say it out loud...Or if you are really lucky you might get Grandpa!!!
My grandfather passed away 2 years ago. Like all families this passing was hard for everyone. Unlike most families his remains are a common topic of discussion. (I know I keep saying these things out loud and you are getting more and more disturbed. Please just remember we all look normal on the outside!!) You see Grandpa was cremated and now sits on a bookshelf at my moms house. Why we can't buy a plot and bury the Urn is beyond me!! Her mom, my Grandma (who is divorced from my grandpa mind you) has decided that he needs to be shared with everyone!! We are not talking every other weekend with the urn folks!! Grandma has decided that we should split the ashes and everyone can have part of Grandpa. I know you are sitting there reading this either shaking your head, you have gone back to make sure you read that last part right, or your mouth is not gaping open. It is OK! Yes you read it right. And NO I am not kidding.
Ashlee my little sister has had this running joke that we should give Grandpa as a White Elephant gift at the Family Christmas Party for the last year. And please know we mean no disrespect. But rather know that Grandpa would be gathering all his angel friends around to have a look at the totally fun Grandkids he has!! And then he would point out his lovely daughters crying in the corner.
We (the grandkids) do not see how this is any less OK than splitting up his ashes. We have no intentions of ever opening the urn, But rather get something that signifies Grandpa to put in the gift pile. Then the lucky person that draws that gift will be the one to spend the coming year with Grandpa! Seem fair enough and far less disturbing to us.
What signifies grandpa you might be asking yourself. Well please have not fear I will tell you!! AS SEEN ON T.V.!!! That says Grandpa loud and clear!!! He was know for his Christmas Gifts!! Every year it was a joy to find out what grandpa sent us. He spent a lot of time looking at ads and watching commercials on TV. He would then purchase these items and send them to us for Christmas. You could get anything form a necklace, doll, or Christmas bear. To a Microwave Bacon cooker, Orange juicer or a set of salt and pepper shakers that could only fit the enough for one potato!! We loved and looked forward to Grandpas gifts all year!!
So this is our plan... Get an As seen on TV item from the store (you can get them in stores now!! Grandpa would be so happy about that!) The lucky person gets to take ALL of Grandpa and the newly purchased item home...until next year!! Grandpa gets to stay together and still be shared around the family. Anything else you would like us to solve.
Oh and I think I forgot to mention on little detail...We (the grandkids) will vow to share any inside information we may have as to the location, and wrapping paper of the As Seen on TV gift. You see we all love Grandpa but we are OK not spending the coming year with him!!
I am sure that everyone thinks their family is strange and I am sure they are it some extent. But if you ever get feeling down and want to know you are not alone. Just know that until you start having discussions about Grandpa...You and your family are totally fine!!
Merry Christmas!!!
